Wednesday, September 7, 2005

success!

- operation poo has been completed. no casualities were had. party time!

Tuesday, September 6, 2005

to win or not to win

- so i'm moved in, and i'm starting to get accustomed to the loudness and the drunkenness and the constant music. i even walked to the showers in just my bathrobe this morning, and while i'm a fan of nakedness, others are not generally a fan of it on me, so that was quite the achievement.

- there were two things that disturbed me very much about the whole washroom experience, though.

- firstly, in our washroom, which has clearly been designated as a women's washroom according to the large imposing sign that states "women," there is a urinal. that's right, i said it, a urinal. i'm not sure if perhaps the makers of the women's washroom were unaware, but urinals are useless to those of us who carry vaginas around in our pants. you know why? we have no directional control, hence the pee would not go in the urinal but instead most likely down our leg. therefore, down with urinals.

- secondly, i can't poo in public places. i can't even say a dirtier word for poo when it has to do with me and public places. it just doesn't come out. i'm too afraid. the washrooms? very public. also very much like a place. therefore no pooing for me. i'm a little nervous to find out how this is going to work out.

- something that's not very disturbing? oh, that would be the sign inside of the stall the quite determined-ly states, "winners flush!"

- i'm a winner.

Friday, September 2, 2005

itsy bitsy spider

- as i'm sure most you know, the average person eats somewhere in the vicinity of nine spiders a year in their sleep.

- sometimes i wake up in the morning and immediately think, "wow, i must have had a real big juicy one last night."